Theoretically speaking of course, but if one has blackmail information on a member(s) of the clergy and uses it to obtain an absolution from various fasts like the upcoming Apostle’s fast for example; is it truly wrong? You are in a manner of speaking covering your brothers sin.
And more importantly is this actionable under the law? Does it meet the legal requirements for extortion since there is no financial gain whether in goods or services? Also is there any actionable fiduciary breach?
P.S. Again hypothetically speaking of course, if there were such priests for whom I had in theory information on, I would be theoretically be waiting for a phone call. Just speaking abstractly, you know who you are.
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Fr. Onophrious, priest of St. Macarius and St. Barbara Church, disappeared suddenly last Saturday and no one has heard from him since. His family has gone into hiding and no one has been able to reach them for any Many congregants are speculating he was kidnapped by muslims. Other were saying that tasoni had left him. Others were claiming he was recalled to Egypt for teaching heresy or he stole the churches money. Yet others thought it was abouna’s vacation and weren’t concerned. Disturbingly there was a small yet vocal group that were carrying on about abouna being taken up by angels or aliens, most then claiming to have been witnesses.
In a Coptic News Network exclusive scoop, we managed to track down the babysitter for Fr. Onophrious’ 3 year old son. As the priest had an afternoon nap before going to the church for vespers, his son got a hold of a pair of scissor and mutilated the priest’s beard as he slept. By the time he awoke, it was too late to salvage his beard and he was forced to shave it all off. In embarassment and shame is in hiding until it grows back.
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…why Priests hold a cross next to their face in portrait pictures?
Not to look cool or some great piety. It is so they would not be mistaken for muslim sheikhs, mullahs or even terrorists. Cover up the cross and you will see it is true, especially with the one that have scant or thin mustaches. Seriously if I didn’t know that that some of the reverend fathers were Christian priests I’d be calling Homeland Security on them. It does not help that Iranian mullahs have hats that resemble a priest’s emma.
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In light of the huge success of Coptic Pick-up Lines posts, we at NSSW have decide to come up with Coptic rejection lines to use on inferior pick up lines.
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The Inquisitor: This person asks questions. Alot of questions, knowing the answer to most of them. He does this to try and trap you and to see whether or not you are a heretic. Never quite convinced of your Orthodoxy despite your ability to satisfactorily answering the questions. Such individuals fancy themselves great defenders of the faith, mostly men who think this attractive to women.
The Chronically Amazed: Such a person is constantly expressing amazement at each new revelation you bestow upon them. Such facts like the reason we fast Fridays is to remember Christ’s crucifixion or that Luke actually wrote both the Gospel and the book of Acts and other such facts you believe to be rather common knowledge. Sadly such people are not recent converts or young children which this is expect of but rather people you have seen in church their entire lives, yet some how they managed to be unsullied by any sort of knowledge.
The Ortho-Protestant: Some how every time this person asks a question it happens to be about a point of protestant theology which this person insists is orthodox theology. Questions like “What happens to our bodies between when we are raptured and judgment day?” or “How do we know we are among the predestined for salvation?” etc. Which is extremely disconcerting because like the aforementioned group, you have seen them in church their entire lives. Its as if someone slipped them a book by Luther or Calvin and told them it was a text book of Orthodoxy.
The Closet Uniate: Same as the Ortho-Protestant but in regards to Catholic theology.
The Echo: For every point you have this person will chime in with his own take on what is being discussed, sometimes repeating exactly what you said. Sometimes they will interject with some thing that has nothing to do with the topic at hand. Their comments have no redeeming value to them. For example while speaking about prayer the echo will interject wit “when you pray you are speaking with God” and then follow minutes later with “God listens to us when we pray” et c..
The Crash Test Dummy: Emphasis on the dummy. They are bodies taking space up in chairs. For a normal human being, it takes serious effort to not pay any attention nor have any information seep into your head, like it does with them. If asked why they are there, they have no answer nor know why they’re there. Sometimes they wander in just looking for somewhere to sit. The percentage of them in any group rises in direct proportion to the amount of food after the meeting.
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Tired of being told “o’balik” [i.e. may you be next] at weddings or asked when are you getting married, just reply “I would love to get marry as soon as possible but the Church will not marry me and my boyfriend/girlfriend (choose the same gender equivalent)”
This get them to stop asking you but may cause a whole host of other questions.
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May 21, 2011 6:00pm EST has come and gone. I called all the servants and Sunday School children under my care and every one of them is still here. Good thing we do not accept the rapture because it would be pretty embarrassing otherwise that all of them are still here.
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I know for the majority of Copts, English is a second language. Shockingly though I find that actually many American born Copts do not know the difference between an adjective and a noun or how to use them in a sentence. To be fair it is with only one word and its adjectival form, but it should the most important word(s) in their vocabulary. It is the word Copt (and Coptic).
Copt is a noun, Coptic is an adjective. Use them as such! You can say “I am a Copt” or “I am Coptic”; but to say “I am a Coptic”, you show yourself ignorant of a language you speak everyday. I bet you are ignorant of the teachings and histories of the Coptic Church whose deep teachings and intelligent saints have saved the Christian world from heresy on several occasions, as well. But you bring shame to that legacy by not knowing how to use simple parts of speech, something one learns in the first grade. You don’t say “I am a blue” so why do you insist on saying “I am a Coptic” or even better yet using it in the plural, “There are a lot of Coptics here”. Aaargh! Do yourself and us a favor and go join some Pentecostal speaking in tongues group because at least then you will not have to worry about your bad grammar bringing shame upon you and your Coptic ancestors (see here it is adjective modifying ancestor, to say “Copt ancestors” would be stupidity.)
We, Copts (not Coptics), did not survive countless persecutions for 2000 years with our heads high, only to be brought low by your ignorance of simple grammar. A church with a legacy of the greatest theologians and you, their spiritual successor, can not even form a simple sentence. We must be truly in the end times.
Though if we were in the motherland and speaking our true tongue this would not be an issue, so the reason we are suffering the scourge of bad grammar amongst our people is the fault of the Muslims who tried to stamp out use of our beautiful language and forced us to flee to foreign lands to learn strange languages.
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Kicking and screaming we are being dragged into the 21st century.
You can now follow us on Twitter as NotSoSpiritual .
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Not So Spiritual Words 