“Because of National Geographics Magazine, I was 14 years old before I learned not every naked woman carried a spear”

– David Brennar

When going out with your grandmother avoid Spanish neighborhoods, especially if she is hard of hearing and need to call out to her. (Apparently, the Egyptian for grandmother, teta, is the same as the Spanish for breast or tit)

You know you’re a loser, if you get fired from a volunteer position.

You know you’ve hit rock-bottom when you look through the obituaries for job openings.

Its an odd feeling when you notice that if your father had long hair, he’d look like a member of a popular heavy metal band. (It is cool yet disturbing feeling).

“Being loved is a great feeling, but being lusted after is not so bad a feeling either”

– unknown

Have you ever stopped and wondered why the voices in your head don’t like you? I mean they’re living there for free, they should at least pretend to like you. But no, there always criticizing and ….. (I think I should take my meds now ; P )

Why is it that when people speak to a non-native speaker of English, they’ll talk with an accent, as if that would make things clearer to the non-native speaker?

Watch at the end of the liturgy when Abouna sprays the water, there will be several bald men who will rub it all over their heads, yet none with hair will.