“Do not try the patience of a wizard, for we are subtle and quick to anger”

– Gandalf from J.R.R. Tolkien’s “The Hobbit”

“The best vegetable is meat”

-Old Alsatian saying

What do you say to a priest or bishops who sneeze because you can’t say “Bless you” to them (ecclesiatic reason only the high ranking clergy member present can give a blessing)?

There is an old Irish custom of young couples making love in the fields outside a house where there is wake or funeral going on, to show life is greater than death.

You know you’re screwed for life when wondering “Why me?” God answers “Because its fun.”.

You know you’re on the wrong path, when you’re the first person that clergy go to when they need a little a breaking and entering perpetrated.

“Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the Lord my soul to keep.
If I die before I wake,
Thank you God.”

Eskimos used the baculum of walruses as war clubs, called an oosik. The baculum is a bone found in the penises of many mammal species.

Cynic: an idealist with bad luck

Good Idea: Helping a friend, whose car ran out of gas, get a container of gas and put it in their car.
Bad Idea: Using the left over gasoline to make flaming designs on the ground (particularly if it is church property)