George Mansour and his family thought they were going to sit to a traditional American thanksgiving dinner. Their idyllic plans were suddenly shattered by a simple innocent phone call that had dire repercussions for the family. Mr. Mansour states he was sitting at home watching television as his wife and children were setting the table and preparing dinner when he received a call from his parish priest wishing him and his family a happy thanksgiving, “He would not take up much of my time since I am probably eagerly awaiting to eat the turkey. I agreed with him and told how excited I was also to eat creme caramel since my wife rarely makes it.” Within a minute of hanging up the phone with the priest Mr. Mansour and family found themselves the object of a clerical raid. “I hung up the phone and the next thing I know, the world went black. I was surrounded by black and beards.” he stated gravely. The family was then forced to perform metonias while the taskforce emptied the house of non fasting foods and then left as suddenly as they appeared. Even the apparent humor in seeing his mother-in-law, who is as wide as she is tall, attempt to do a metonia could not bring levity to the situation in Mr. Mansour’s mind. “It was like a Coptic Inquisition. Nobody expects the Coptic Inquisition”
A spokesperson for the Council of Coptic Bishops Serving in the United States released a statement saying,”While we find such extreme measure unfortunate but necessary as a majority of the congregation refuse to fast the start of the Advent fast for the sake of eating turkey. A bird has gained greater importance in the minds of these people that the Incarnation of our Lord and Savior. It is better that people learn a difficult lesson now than come judgment day and the Lord asking where is your turkey now?”
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Happy Thanksgiving All.
Hope you all enjoyed your meal with turkey and all the trimmings?
(If you answered yes to above question you all will burn in Hades for your love of devouring a bird so stupid it will drown in the rain is greater than your desire to fast in to properly prepare yourself for the coming of your Savior in the flesh, humbling himself from the heights of glory to be incarnate and born in a manger)
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Your Grace,
If I become a vampire, could I live just by drinking blood of Christ during communion.
Sayedna
Is there a hotline to call if I suspect my abouna is actually a terrorist. I see pictures of them on the news and they look very much like some of our priests. Seriously if they were dressed in black I couldn’t tell the difference. Is there some sort of code word that real priests have, so I don’t accidentally get abouna sent to Gitmo, even though he might enjoy the vacation away from our congregation. It might not go so well with me in confession with him if I did.
Your Grace,
Is wrong if your father of confession starts pimping you out? For example makes an appointment for you to confess you show up and find a girl waiting for you in his office.
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Not So Spiritual Words 