When your mother says you are free to do whatever you want; you ARE NOT! Its a trap!!!! Do exactly what she wants or you will pay a dear price for it. (N.B. this also applies for wives)
Love is …
“Prolonged exposure to women causes mental disorientation and physical confusion.”
– from “Ed, Edd, & Eddy”
Black Day in History
1285 – Philip III of France died of the plague.
1796 – Spain declared war on Britain in the Napoleonic Wars.
1859 – An arsonist sets fire inside New York City’s iron and glass Crystal Palace, the most presitigious museum in the U.S. at the time. It burns to the ground, causing $2M damage and destroying thousands of priceless artifacts.
1877 – After marching for more than 1,400 miles and confronting 2,000 US soldiers along the way, Chief Joseph surrendered with starving remnant of Nez Perce people.
1930 – The British airship R101 crashed on its first flight at Allonne, near Beauvais, France, killing 48 of its 54 passengers.
1942 – German engineer Herman Graebe witnesses a Nazi mass execution in the Ukraine.
1942 – America’s ‘Yankee Doodle Dandy’, George M. Cohan, died at age 64.
1954 – Blaming “conflicting career demands” for the breakup of their 9-month marriage, screen actress Marilyn Monroe filed suit for divorce in Santa Monica, California, against baseball star Joe DiMaggio on grounds of mental cruelty
1970 – Anwar Sadat was nominated to succeed Gamal Abdel Nasser as president of Egypt.
1994 – Almost 50 members of the Order of the Solar Temple sect died in two suicide fires in Switzerland.
1998 – Infamous David Letterman stalker, Margaret Ray, age 46, committed suicide by kneeling in front of a train in Colorado.
1999 – In a move reminiscent of a strange combination of Nazi crimes committed against Gypsies and the postwar construction of the Berlin Wall, the town of Usti nad Labem in the Czech Republic begins construction of a wall to separate a portion of its Gypsy population away from more respectable folks.
According to Hoyle
Never play Russian roulette with a semi-automatic, it takes all the fun out of the game. (or just make sure you go last.)
Letter Writing
“Did the Ephesians ever write back ?”
– Unknown
What a Way to Go
“1/3 of all Tawainese funeral processions include a stripper.”
Also applicable to Bishops…
“Do not try the patience of a wizard, for we are subtle and quick to anger”
– Gandalf from J.R.R. Tolkien’s “The Hobbit”
Pets
When choosing a pet, only choose a pet you are reasonably confident you can defeat in hand-to-hand struggle, in case of food-chain-hierarchy disputes.
– from “The Onion”
Sampling?
The tune to the hymn/song “Love, Love, Love, the gospel in a word is love…” taught by H.G. Anba Moussa bears an uncanny resemblance to a traditional Celtic song about “Souling” an ancient tradition which is the forerunner to trick or treating, where people would leave a soul cake to appease to spirits that wander about during All Hallows Eve (Samhain).
8-Bit pr0n
Here is a weird piece of info. Apparently for the old Atari 2600 (remember it?), there were a slew of x-rated games made for it. It begs the question with the extremely low resolution on the atari how can you tell those are naked people?