The militant Copt feels a need to comment on a news scandal sweeping the Coptic community, about an exchange student starving nearly to death while starving with a Coptic family. First this would have never occurred if he had stayed with a Sa’idi family, the opposite news article would have occurred, where he would have ended up dying of morbid obesity. Second of all, who has ever lost that much weight during a fast, You have older gentleman in church with guts large enough to hide a small family of Cambodian refugees in, fasting does nothing to make it disappear. Also if that was the case we would not have overweight monks. Also he was only there during advent fast (and possibly St. Mary’s) what a wimp, any child can do that standing on his head. Daniel was able to eat beans and gain weight. Also he was staying Alexandria and couldn’t get fish? I think this was a case of anti-coptic snobbery where he felt he was too good to eat our humble fare of foul, the food of the pharaohs. That our leeks, garlic, onions and melons of which the children of Israel were willing to forsake God for, were not good enough for his fast food swilling palate. He was probably paid off by the Islamic Brotherhood to starve himself to bring worldwide negative attention to the Copts and our pious zeal in fasting. He should be forced to live on mish and moloha for a year to know the greatness of Egyptian cuisine.
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*some maybe very regional
(none of these are made up I’ve heard all of them growing up, which may explain alot about how I turned out.)
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*For the unaware the only way a coptic priest retires is via death.
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Clergy or Terrorist: Take cropped photos, showing only their face, of either priest or terrorists and have them guess which it is. (Not as easy one would believe, especially with certain priests) Variation: Saint or Sinner: where you tell them a name of a heretic or a saint and have them figure out which is which.
What Do You Know?: Ask your kids very basic questions about the church and our faith and see what answers you get, like “Where was Jesus born?” or “Was Jesus God or man?” et c. Depending on the age of the kids, the wrong answers can be cute and funny (kindergartners) or disturbing and depressing (high schoolers).
Witchhunt: Convince the kids one of the other servants is teaching heresy (which might actually be true considering some of the sunday school teachers I’ve seen) and they have to find out who it is so it can be reported to abouna. (especially fun if there is servant you don’t care for and poin the kids in his/her direction)
Paranoia: Teach the kids the devil is real and out to get them, reinforce this with footage of exorcisms and other frightening sounds and footage. See how long they go without sleep. Warning this game has to potential to permanently scar the kids which makes it funnier to me. (one needs a night light ever since, another can only go to the bathroom with the door open)
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“At length they saw a man coming (namely Paul), of a low stature, bald (or shaved) on the head, crooked thighs, handsome legs, hollow-eyed; had a crooked nose; full of grace; for sometimes he appeared as a man, sometimes he had the countenance of an angel. And Paul saw Onesiphorus, and was glad.”
–from the apocryphal “Acts of Paul and Thecla” 1:7
Basically it sounds like St. Paul looked like George Costanza
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At the Political rallies of candidates you don’t like get the crowds to chant “”This is the voice of a god, not of a man.” God will strike them dead (unfortunately not so effective against evangelical candidates).
Based on Acts 12:21-23
thanks to d.h. for idea
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“ Don’t question God, for He may reply: “If you’re so anxious for answers, come up here.”
– unknown
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Not So Spiritual Words 