2006 January

Actual things said by Sunday School kids, I wish (for the sake of the church’s future) I was making this up but its all true.

– St. Mina was a pimp
– Jesus was born in Egypt.
– St. George’s first name was Mary (as in Mari Gerges)
– The prodigal son should has just killed himself when he ran out of money
– Deuteronomy was written by St. Paul and he only wrote two epistles.
– St. Mark’s Gospel is only 3 chapters long.
– Divorce is one of the seven sacraments
– Judas was muslim.
– Israelites wander in the wilderness 40 years because they did not use a map.

– You are mugged on weekly basis during your lesson.
– The FBI asks you to wear a wire to class.
– You watch CSI more for informational purposes than entertainment
– Abouna asks you whats RICO* and why your Sunday school kids know it better than the “Lord’s Prayer”
– Your Sunday school class finds the life story of St. Moses the Black inspirational, unfortunately the pre-repentance portion.
– “Lord of the Flies” hit a little to close to home.
– As you walk to your Sunday School class the other servants hum “Aripamevi”
– The tithes you collect from your Sunday school class is mostly counterfeit bills.
– The student try to see who breaks all Ten Commandments first.
– You feel a strong need to confess before and after class.

* Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organizations Statute (used to prosecute Orginized Crime)