Jun 30
When someone goes in to confess to abouna, people start chanting “2 men enter, 1 man leaves”
Abouna insists on a secret passage leading out of the church be built under the altar.
Pre-servant’s class besides lessons on theology and dogma have lessons on close quarter combat.
Mustaches are grafitti-ed on the icons (or removed if the saint already has one)
Instead of cymbals accompanying the hymns a boombox is used.
Deacons are armed with stun guns during processions for their own protection.
The old ladies in church are members of the local chapter of the Hells Angels.
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Not So Spiritual Words 