2001 May

May 23

Eskimos used the baculum of walruses as war clubs, called an oosik. The baculum is a bone found in the penises of many mammal species.

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May 22

Your Grace,
My intercessor saint doesn’t seem to to anything for me, I see the my friend’s intecessors do things for them but nothing for me. Is there someone I can speak to register a complaint or file paperwork changing my saint.

Sayedna,
When we die and if we go to heaven, can we choose which heaven we go to? I mean if I go to heaven, I’d like to go to the Islamic heaven, they’ve got rivers of wine that doesn’t cause hangovers, endless feasts and naked servants of the opposite sex. That sound like a good time and I wouldn’t mind spending eternity there. Also, I mean if we’re already going to heaven, what difference does it matter, which one?

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May 16

Cynic: an idealist with bad luck

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May 15

Good Idea: Helping a friend, whose car ran out of gas, get a container of gas and put it in their car.
Bad Idea: Using the left over gasoline to make flaming designs on the ground (particularly if it is church property)

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May 14

“If God believed in the metric system, Jesus would have had only 10 disciples.”

– Unknown

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May 11

Have you ever stopped and wondered why the voices in your head don’t like you? I mean they’re living there for free, they should at least pretend to like you. But no, there always criticizing and ….. (I think I should take my meds now ; P )

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May 06

“[Priests] shall have linen turbans on their heads and linen trousers on their bodies; they shall not clothe themselves with anything that causes sweat.” (Ezekiel 44:18)

Commentary: Even though our prayers are like the sweet savor of incense before the Lord, He is repulsed by our body odor. So all those who minister the altar of the Lord should be showered and liberally coated with deodorant.

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May 02

“Germans are very good people, I would have been German but unfortunately both my parents were Egyptians.”

– from “Five Graves to Cairo” (1943)

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